DaddyRoBlog

Because They Can

Well, they're at it again.

http://www.alaskanalpineclub.org/IceTower/05-06IceTowers5.html

I'm glad it's cold somewhere.  It was 60 degrees here today...

Complaint and Conviction

OK, I know the dental updates are getting old (and it's not the kind of thing I really expect people to go out of their way to read).  But my mouth is still really sore and my cheek really puffy and it's actually hard for me to talk.

At least that introduces an element of suspense (!). I'm wondering how tomorrow I'm going to get through three services and an important meeting afterwards.  Should be an interesting day.

This morning I heard this poem read and it is fabulous.  Perhaps you've seen it already.   If not:  enjoy! 

Totally like whatever, you know?

In case you hadn't noticed,
it has somehow become uncool
to sound like you know what you're talking about?
Or believe strongly in what you're saying?
Invisible question marks and parenthetical (you know?)'s
have been attaching themselves to the ends of our sentences?
Even when those sentences aren't, like, questions? You know?

Declarative sentences -- so-called
because they used to, like, DECLARE things to be true
as opposed to other things which were, like, not -
have been infected by a totally hip
and tragically cool interrogative tone? You know?
Like, don't think I'm uncool just because I've noticed this;
this is just like the word on the street, you know?
It's like what I've heard?
I have nothing personally invested in my own opinions, okay?
I'm just inviting you to join me in my uncertainty?

What has happened to our conviction?
Where are the limbs out on which we once walked?
Have they been, like, chopped down
with the rest of the rain forest?
Or do we have, like, nothing to say?
Has society become so, like, totally...
I mean absolutely... You know?
That we've just gotten to the point where it's just, like...
whatever!

And so actually our disarticulation... ness
is just a clever sort of... thing
to disguise the fact that we've become
the most aggressively inarticulate generation
to come along since...
you know, a long, long time ago!

I entreat you, I implore you, I exhort you,
I challenge you: To speak with conviction.
To say what you believe in a manner that bespeaks
the determination with which you believe it.
Because contrary to the wisdom of the bumper sticker,
it is not enough these days to simply QUESTION AUTHORITY.
You have to speak with it, too.


© Taylor Mali 2005

Opening of the Book I Haven't Written

Despite being a reasonably young man, there were days when Ed felt very, very old.  Though there is perhaps a majestic old, like a giant redwood that has existed for centuries, or the face of the sea which has cast forth her glory since time began, the old he felt did not feel majestic at all.  It simply felt tired, weary, irrelevant.

                                                                  

On these days Ed often thought of the term “dinosaur”, and wondered if that was indeed what he was.  Had his time passed?  Had the world changed so much that it no longer really needed him?  Were the things he believed foolish and outdated?

Perhaps it was the cold, gray light of the fading days of late fall that was seeping into his soul, but on this day at least, it certainly seemed that way to him. 

Richmond, VA

Well, I'm now staying at the Marriott in Richmond and guess what?  No wireless internet, and (once again!) $10 a day to plug in.  That's going to make for some LONGGGG meetings tomorrow...

Couldn't really eat today--cheek and tongue are just too, uh, chewed up and swollen from yesterday.  I've got the lopsided chipmunk thing going.

Not being able to eat isn't bad.  I'm in full winter fat mode, pushing the scale at 200 lbs. Though years ago I used to weigh 214 pounds with less than 5% bodyfat (and had to eat all the time keep my weight up), 200lbs these days is a very different matter. 

I really do need to start exercising again, and that was one of the three goals I set for myself this year.   So far I don't think I've even taken a walk! 

Those of you who know me have my  full permission to nag me about this.

Confession

I've been thinking lately about what might be called first and second order loves.

What I mean is this:  we all probably "love" a lot of different things, but some loves are deeper than others.  The deepest of these loves I'd call first order loves, and then other "loves" would be ranked behind them as second order loves (or third or fourth order and so on--you get the picture.)

In other words, I love cars.  I didn't always--when I was a kid growing up, I didn't know the first thing about cars and couldn't have cared less.  But somewhere along the line--I'm not sure how or why--that changed.

Today, for instance when I dropped my youngest daughter off at school, there was a kid driving in the parking lot in his Subaru WRX STI (a $30,000+ car).  What a cool car that is. How I'd love to own one!

But I don't. I drive a 1994 Buick LeSabre with over 100,000 miles on it that my dad gave me.  Why? Because I love being able to help out those in need more than I love cars.  Giving is a higher order love for me than cars.  I spend as little as I can on cars so I can give away as much as I can away.

I hope you don't stop reading there thinking this is a post boasting about what a good person I am.  Because all that is the prelude to what I really want to write about:  how confusing this gets for me sometimes.

That's why I like the words "first and second order loves".   For better or for worse, it captures how deeply I really do care about cars (and a host of other things if you really want to know the truth.)

People talk about how doing the right thing--volunteering, for instance--brings a sense of joy and fulfillment like nothing else in life.  For the most part, I believe that is true.

But sometimes...it is just hard.  It doesn't feel right at all.  In fact, it feels profoundly wrong, unfair, and unjust.

I guess my point is, don't nominate me for sainthood just yet.   The depth of envy I felt--even if just for a moment--for the student in his STI seems a pretty clear indication that I've still got a long way to go!

What Not To Do

This morning I had my first cavity in forever.  I haven't had a filling since…I can't even remember; probably since I was a young kid.

The dentist starting numbing my jaw at 7AM this morning.  He began with three shots of local anesthetic.  When I still wasn't very numb, he did three more little injections into the gum right at the base of the tooth. 

That did the trick.  He hit the lingual nerve; my tongue went dead.  My lips lost their feeling.  My cheek had no sensation whatsoever.  When the dentist put the filling in, I didn't feel a thing.

I never even thought about having to talk at my 9AM appt, however.  That was a premarital counseling session, where we talked about how expectations shape relationships in the context of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI).  What fun!

I also never considered that my mouth might still be numb for my lunch appointment.  Now that was a really big mistake.  I think I chewed my tongue and cheek more than my food (I know, that is probably TMI--more information than you really need to know). 

And guess what?  Now that some feeling is finally returning--it hurts!

Feeding the Fish

Because we didn't get to go snorkeling on Saturday as we planned (too much wind and too little visibility), I was trying to figure out how I could get my kids to see more fish.  Somewhere in the back of my mind I remembered a marina right by the side of the road that had a couple small pools in front with some cool fish in them.  That seemed like it might be a fun place to stop.

The marina turned out to be Capt. Hook's --http://www.captainhooks.com/index.htm.  The pools in front were just as I remembered them; full of fish like puffers (my kid's favorite!), brilliantly colored parrot fish, sharks, tarpon, big old grouper, hogfish and pilot fish and so on.

They were scheduled to feed the fish at 4PM, but we had to leave earlier to get back in time for the sunset cruise in the evening.  So I went inside and asked if we could buy some bait and feed the fish ourselves. 

We were introduced to the owner, a very nice lady who had just moved down from Michigan and bought the place.  She cut some fish up for us, and put it in a bucket.  She would not accept payment as she handed it to us.

So the kids got to feed the fish, which would come right up to their hands.  A couple of the grouper would actually stick their head out of the water and open their mouths until you dropped something in.  And when we got a better view of them, we saw that some of the tarpon and sharks were actually very big and quite impressive.  I think I'll do a photo album in addition to the pics here for those who are interested. 

The owner told us that at night when everyone is gone, people sneak in and fish in these ponds.  They frequently find hooks in the sharks, and grouper go missing regularly.  This prompted what was probably the best line of the trip.

Mary said, "If someone stole my shark, I'd be really mad!"

Florida Keys, Day Two

Hello once again from Key Largo.  It's a cloudy 76 degrees, but the sun is supposed come out a little later in the day.  Our 24 hour internet connection last until noon today, so I thought I'd do another quick post.

Today is hang out day.  There is a nice little beach here with lots of water activities (jet skis, parasailing, kayaks--stuff like that.)  So we'll probably spend most of our time there and at the pools which are nicely landscaped and designed (and heated).

You may recall that when we were in Montana, Mary loved riding the ATVs.  I'm trying to convince her that a jet ski is just like an ATV, only on water.  So far she's not buying it, but we'll see.  Christine, on the other hand, is ready to go.

The setting of the hotel itself is also pretty cool. It's situated in a tropical hardwood hammock, with all kinds of interesting trees.  There is a beautiful little balcony outside our room.  Nestled in the tree tops, you can just see the water slightly beyond. 

I just realized--the image just popped right into my head-- that last night I dreamed I caught an Albino yellow rat snake while walking among the trees.  Anybody care to speculate on what that means?  (So far all I've really seen is one lizard, a little anole).

Quick story:  When we got here and were picking up the rental car, the man helping us asked us if we'd like a convertible.  He said the bride and groom to be were supposed to get one, but there had been a mix up.  Since we all flew into Ft. Lauderdale and Key Largo is a good two hours below that, he thought we might drive the convertible down and then trade vehicles with the couple getting married.

Sounded great to us, except it turned out the convertible was Chrysler's Crossfire, a two seater that is sort of like Winnie the Pooh except that instead of being a bear with little brain it is a car with little trunk (where that analogy came from don't ask me.)  Since there are four of us it clearly wasn't going to work, though I tried to sell my wife on letting my kids hitch hike down to the hotel.

We ended up with a Mazda MPV… 

Florida Keys Day One

Hello from Key Largo.  At 7:15 in the evening, it's a very pleasant 74 degrees.

We are staying at the Sheraton Beach Resort.  You can check it out here if you're interested:  http://www.keylargoresort.com/. It is a very cool place, and we are having a great time.

Unfortunately, we forgot our camera cable, which means I can't download pictures (which is all the more problematic because after just the first day, our memory card is full).  So no pictures until we get back Mon evening.

Also, much to my surprise, an internet connection is not included in the package, and must be purchased at $10 a day.  Sorry, we don't need it that bad, and we're not in the room much to use it anyway.  We did buy the connection today so my daughters could send their grandmother an email as she had requested (for Christmas, my mother requested that instead of buying a present that all her grandkids send her a monthly email on the date of their birthdays.)

Highlights of the Day:

*If an internet connection wasn't part of the room package, a great breakfast buffet was.  Let's see…of the two, I'd take…food!

*Drove down to Bahia Honda (lower mid-Keys; Milepost 37; you can check it out here:  http://www.bahiahondapark.com/.   We know a "secret spot" there that is awesome for snorkeling, but that section of the park was closed due to hurricane damage.  Ah well, we went to another spot in the park the locals call "The Aquarium", a well protected deep water harbor, and saw quite a few fish there (no snorkeling, but you can see them from the bank).

*Stopped for a slice of Key Lime pie for lunch.

*On the way back we stopped at Captain Hooks and fed the fish.  More on that later.

*Went on an evening cruise and watched the sun set over the gulf.

Friday Catch Up

Time has become a real issue in my life.  I wrote in my private journal last year that “this is the year I ran out of time”.   

For the past few years I have been cutting “discretionary” activities (such as hobbies) and interests out of my life in order to keep up with increased demands on my time.  At the start of 2005, I couldn’t see anything else to cut, but the demands were still growing.

And guess what?  As I sit here this morning, Friday February 20, 2006, I am painfully aware that I have still more to do now than I did this time last year… 

***

To those who made the jump over to the book/movie reviews mentioned below, I apologize for the formatting problems on our website. 

Let me be quick to add how much I appreciate the good people who maintain that site (one of whom I know reads this blog).   With a toddler, full time job, and other volunteer commitments, they work the website into an already full schedule.  More than that, they do a great job, and believe me, I’m grateful.

But for some reason—I don’t even begin to understand the programming that goes into it—we’ve had an off/on problem with words running together.  Sometimes the end of the line gets cut off as well.

Take this sentence from last week’s sermon:  Let’s say you are driving a Lexus—the new IS 300, for instance.  Somehow the slashes got dropped out, so it actually reads  Lets say you are diving a Lexus the new IS300, for instance.

You still understand it, of course, but it doesn’t read well.  So again, my apologies.   We do actually proof everything we write, and we are working on making sure the website reflects that as well.

***      ***      ***

My family and I leave for the Florida Keys today.  I’m looking forward to the trip—because quality time with family is one thing I definitely don’t want to get squeezed out of the schedule!